Second Life Addiction

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May 2012

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[Babybear Serenity]

http://imthevilprincess.hubpages.com/hub/SecondLife-addiction

After you read her introduction, see if you can stomach the replies/comments without doing a self-evaluation.
The original post was written over 2 years ago, the last reply was about 15 minutes ago. There is some great advice in the comments section for those of us that are "soft addicts". If we're in denial, this just might be the wake up call we need.

I know the OP deleted the original post, due to sensitivity, but there is nothing wrong with us as a community recognizing how this virtual world can and does affect those we profess to care about. If we really are more then just soulless pixels to each other then when a friend needs to cut SL out of their life for their own good, we should support them and offer other means to maintain communication.

My name is Eela, and I am an SL addict.

[Laja DeCuir]

Thank you Babybear, that's why I did not remove the whole thread as I was requested be the OP.

Honestly I find it very sad, that you removed all your postings and to all others: If a person who is in the middle of an issue SHE has to solve decides to write here it is not on us to judge this. She never did mention who she is talking about in the first place and even after she said it is about her sister, nobody would know who her sister is, wouldn't you?
Addicts are perfect in drawing the curtain over everything related with the addiction, you really want to join this game? However it is important to me, that we think about judging over others who ask for help. I was really irritated when I read postings about privacy of an unknown and sort of attacking the OP instead of taking serious what the problem was/is about. If you all decide NOT to post things like that, fair enough but please ... every person is different.
Once again - thank you Moon for sharing. You never acted without sensitivity and I do hope you and your beloved ones will find the help you need in professionell hands.

For all the rest of you silent readers: think about you way of coping and maybe you will realise, that you aren't alone and that there will be a way out always!

Take care!

[Meredith Topaz]

I agree that this should be talked about.  However I do know who the OP was referring to, it was easy to put 2 and 2 together.  I can only judge how I would feel if such private details of my life where posted on a public forum. 

That being said, mental health issues should never be shrouded in secrecy, they need to be treated.  Having been in a place where a family member needed help I feel for the OP and what she is going through.

[Laja DeCuir]

Of course Meredith it was easy to say ...well ... this girl is talking about a person close to her. But please - even if I would knoe that your brother, sister or another person is an sl addict I would not know who it is in rl, because I don't know who you are, as long as you don't tell this to me or in public. And she did not do that. She only asked for help and advise. Also I do agree that a forum is not a treatment, nobody in sl will be able to do so either, but we can give advise like some did here.
That was meant when I said, please do not judge. No privacy was harmed at all. In the most cases we all know our avas but rarely rl data.

[steamyraj]

In my opinion..  (( before I was just surfing))

Nobody can fix nobody.... i been in games and i'm still.... i "proudly" play COD and all sniper and so on games... and i could easily "stopped" when i needed...

(( and I did take that thread as advertisement to make SL more famous))

In my opinion (( now reading the “replies”))

Nobody can fix nobody.... i been in games and i'm still.... i "proudly" play COD and all sniper and so on games... and i could easily "stopped" when i needed... (( i have been grounded by my little sister for touching laptop))

When it comes to SL... it's different... there are NO BOTs... each and every doll has emotions.. dolls react and u get trapped in emotions... when u trapped in emotions... F*$* no options...

I see people try to make each other happy.. (( A thinks doing this will make happy B. B thinks following A will make A happy)) so who is happy... noone... and WE LOST...

We call it this “a fast life” no time for emotions and so on.. but are we… NOPE…. We just care for our emotions whichever way it suits us…. I thought media is a way to bring the “BLAH BLAH N BLAH” but … (( not getting in to it))

Some movies addressed this virtual life issues… but in my opinion (( only mine)) Hollywood failed to address the issue.. for example “ Surrogate” and Gamer”…. i’m more fan of “European movies” as they seems to be more reastic then Hollywood… and to be honest… I’m just waiting for the time when I set up everything as per “ my standard” and watch  this polish movie .  here is link for  trailer    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-LhrhSK1Myo&feature=related

I’m workaholic so someone send me this link and ask just replace the word and you will see where you’re going… BUT you need to be “honest” which we fail to… lol…  below is the link… Just be true to yourself not anyone else… http://psychcentral.com/quizzes/netaddiction.htm

 If you know a person… pls try and understand what is a “escape” other than that you can’t help more… but your intentions are so … the person should feel proud to have u as a friend.. all I can say…

Good luck.. God speed…

[Ivan Gehring]

  This is the primary reason I hate forums. Unless the OP is a mental health professional, all I see here is an attempt to defame someone. Drop a small nuke in the middle of SL-Gor in attempt to rally the community to a false cause, and continue the witch-hunt of this individual.

   I'm tired of sitting quietly watching this rubbish unfold. I'm aware of the parties involved and the "story" behind the scenes. This has nothing to do with "addiction" and there is no effort to "help" anyone here - this is a fight over money is what it is, plain and F**king simple.

  I'm not going to start posting details or the whole story, but I'm going to say this: It's a load of horseshit. It's an attempt to isolate this person from everyone in Second Life and back them in a corner.   

  And it won't work.

  So try again.

[Moon Firegrave]

I am sorry Lala, but I cannot keep quiet with such a proud display of ignorance and biast attack from Ivan.
Of course you would say that as it benefits you Ivan. You have everything to gain and nothing to lose. You are dealing with someone who has a problem. That you encourage and fuel the fire is absolutely disgusting. Addicts are so good at pushing the blame to everyone else. They are the victims. Always the victims... and yes you damn right it does involve money. Stealing USD 5000 is serious; they are the actions of desperate person. Having said that we need to be held responsible and accountable for our actions. 
I spoke to the community as I knew there were others out there who had the same experiences, who were in my shoes too! And yes I have made contact with some who have experienced worse things than me. I live in South Africa and she is in South America, it’s not like I can walk down the road or get into the car and go and help her. It’s a catch 21. The really sad thing is, I brought it to your attention Ivan because it had hit a critical path. You are completely in the dark with the lies and pretences, you just don’t know it, I however think you knew there was a problem but didn’t want to face it cause you were all to happy to accept the “donations” as you call it.
It has nothing to do with isolation of a person, but collective knowledge and collective support to help. She can switch off her phone, lock her doors, alienate herself from all family and friends, fail to live her life in the real-world. She can lose her job, have no food and feed off second life and get the sustenance she wants and spend 24/7 hooked up and roleplaying with you like the drug it has become, one day she will wake up, look around her and realise what she has done. she will be alone and it will be too late.
And by the way, before you come and shoot your mouth off about knowing the truth... perhaps you should look around, there are others beside me who have RL experience of the lies and knowledge, Alduras, Adira, Kenzo etc. They know first-hand as they like me have been on the receiving end. You only think you know, but they are just lies and what you have been brainwashed to believe. Everybody is the villain and she is the victim. Typical addict behaviours. I am done with it all. The cards are in play and I have done what I could, given the circumstances. You cannot help someone who doesn’t want to be helped. I am leaving this with the Chilean authorities to handle as RL is not like SL, you cant teleport out of this one!

[Mirella Menizah]

I think to begin with this was a serious issue raised with lots of good advice posted and one worthy of discussion. Online addiction is a new phenomenon thats gained momentum over the years, not with just gaming but gambling and social network sites that give addicts a faceless way to feed their habit.

I watched a report that highlighted this when a mother banned her son from using his X-box he displayed symtoms of withdrawal that ended up in councilling.

Its seems though that this post has lost the anonymity that it started with and I wonder if the person in question knows that they are being discussed on a public forum. Added to that the legal implications that have been cited, I would ask that we keep this topic generic and discuss the real issue of addiction or that the post is locked down or deleted if only for the sake of this persons privacy unless they wish to respond.

[Laja DeCuir]

I will close this topic now. All has been said. And before we come to termes where we discuss without any anonymity, I decided to close the topic to at least keep the anonymity for the person who this was all about.

@Moon - There is no help in dealing with it in anger. You have your truth, others have theirs and an addict has his/her own too. It is about talking with each other and getting him/her in professional hands. All has been said to this part.

@Ivan I don't know if you have any insider knowledge but in case you haven't I would be careful to say something like "He/she is not an addict it is just a shitstorm to seperate her/him from her virtual friends." If this would be the case, maybe it is time to ask why one related in rl would do so. Mostly you will come to the result, they are concerned. However if your opinion is a result of your insider knowledge it is all fair enough I only want to avoid that this argument will become another niche for addicts to cultivate their cognitive bias.

Thank you all for the input and helpful links. I am sure there will be some out there who will be grateful and use this for a start.