Too Intense a roleplayer!!??

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May 2012

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May 28 - Memorial Day

[Adoveea Rau]

I'm going to really snarl and rant. Full steel shod talons out and striking.

This is for all those roleplayers, and there are many, who have had to deal with this issue. You're not alone people, I'm posting this for you! Insert your name where I put myself

For the last two years, I've had one phrase said over and over to me, "Dove they can't handle intense roleplay, they're not up to that level of roleplay experience. they get too ooc emotionally involved. They can't handle it. Ease up, don't be so intense".

I'm a very intense roleplayer.  I've been told many many times, by IM oocwise afterwards when a roleplay is over, I make folks *feel*...nervous, hostile, scared,angry, upset, or occasionally, just rolling with hysterical laughter so hard they can't type.

When I get into *mode* of roleplaying, the words come out without thinking, i don't even know what I'm saying or typing, I'm into the scene.  i have to go back and read the logs to find out what I wrote.

So what's the bottom line of the rant about?

Other roleplayers.
 I cannot count how many times over the years, other roleplayers destroy good intense roleplay with their delusions of ooc thoughts of "might, could. happen".
They go into IM to others, they whine and call for help, they do anything BUT put those emotions they feel oocwise INTO their character, right there  into the text for the roleplay

For those other roleplayers
Stop those actions I wrote about. Start going intense, you feel nervous about the situation your character is in? PUT it into roleplay, WRITE it. You are laughing? WRITE it in text. Etc. Etc.

Do that and you'll find that depth you want from roleplay because other roleplayers feed on reactions you post and use them in the scene and fed you their reactions back.

AND you'll get more roleplayers wanting to roleplay WITH you.


...or.....you'll see them run for the safety of their houses when you walk towards them..
*and the eyes glint with icy cold pride*

[Linnet Foggarty]

Thank you Dove.  Lately I've had a few comments directed at me about how "intense" I RP, exactly those words.
I don't think they were complaints necessarily, just suprise, or concern, or perhaps shock?

I play some pretty deep and even dark scenes at times, and though I appreciate people contacting me via IM to see if I'm ok, I am fine.  I like to play intense and if I didn't I can find my way out of an RP on my own if I need to.

I appreciated people being worried on my behalf, but it's not necessary for those walking by or in chat range to interupt the RP or to ask in IMs if I'm ok.  No need for someone to hold back on their character's reaction or limit their RP just because my character is crying or angry or afraid.  That is the reaction that makes sense, it doesn't mean time to stop, it means you are doing it right!

*goes to find Dove*

[Reven]

I'm going to really snarl and rant. Full steel shod talons out and striking.

This is for all those roleplayers, and there are many, who have had to deal with this issue. You're not alone people, I'm posting this for you! Insert your name where I put myself

For the last two years, I've had one phrase said over and over to me, "Dove they can't handle intense roleplay, they're not up to that level of roleplay experience. they get too ooc emotionally involved. They can't handle it. Ease up, don't be so intense".

I'm a very intense roleplayer.  I've been told many many times, by IM oocwise afterwards when a roleplay is over, I make folks *feel*...nervous, hostile, scared,angry, upset, or occasionally, just rolling with hysterical laughter so hard they can't type.

When I get into *mode* of roleplaying, the words come out without thinking, i don't even know what I'm saying or typing, I'm into the scene.  i have to go back and read the logs to find out what I wrote.

So what's the bottom line of the rant about?

Other roleplayers.
 I cannot count how many times over the years, other roleplayers destroy good intense roleplay with their delusions of ooc thoughts of "might, could. happen".
They go into IM to others, they whine and call for help, they do anything BUT put those emotions they feel oocwise INTO their character, right there  into the text for the roleplay

For those other roleplayers
Stop those actions I wrote about. Start going intense, you feel nervous about the situation your character is in? PUT it into roleplay, WRITE it. You are laughing? WRITE it in text. Etc. Etc.

Do that and you'll find that depth you want from roleplay because other roleplayers feed on reactions you post and use them in the scene and fed you their reactions back.

AND you'll get more roleplayers wanting to roleplay WITH you.


...or.....you'll see them run for the safety of their houses when you walk towards them..
*and the eyes glint with icy cold pride*

i love you Dove! and ive had that thrown at me many times too!

[Melchior Wardell]

It couldn't be posted on a better time ! Thank you for this rant Dove, since I was wondering if I might get in this mode of being some sort of stage that I am becoming to unconsiderate to others. Not because I don't care about their feelings, but the ooc drama I get by being - a Gorean man - that stands to his codes, his principles and beliefs. I am not an unreasonable player, but I have been in several scenes were I had to explain that a Gorean man won't take some kind of behavior and that my roleplay wasn't personal to the writer but to the scene. Just to give an example :

[09:42]  My Warrior (Captain) moves closer "I guess we will have to secure you girl ... and be sure that he wishes to have you or wishes you gone ... but I rather not give the pirates the chance." he frowns "And how would you do that since you own nothing girl ... pay the captain with a blowjob ... You think he won't fancy you that much to keep you to himself .. A slave is unprotected on the ship ... No ... you will heel me untill your owner comes to collect you." he takes out a piece of chain and looks if he can find a ring to attach it.

[09:43]  Lady : (name) slave greetings to you

[09:43]  Lady : smiles to her

[09:43]  Slave: Greetings Mistress

[09:43]  Lady : nods to the man

[09:43]  Lady : Tal Sir

[09:43]  Slave: yes Master, of course

[09:43]  My Warrior turns and glares at the woman "You greet a salve before me ?"

[09:44]  Lady : excuse me sir

[09:44]  Lady : i was excited to see her I have been waiting fo rher master to arrive

[09:44]  My Warrior arched a brow "Excuse you ... for what .. for not giving me the proper respect."

[09:44]  Lady : surely you know the ways of the heart now dont you

[09:45]  My Warrior narrows his eyes "What I know and don't seems not to be discussed ... The fact you do not give a man that is here ... working his ass off ... is greeted after a girl was ... What do you think I am ... some pussy whipped fellow that doesn't give a damn."

[09:47]  Freeman (also a warrior ): Tal Sir

[09:47]  Freeman (also a warrior ): Tal lovely Lady

[09:48]  Lady : tilts her head"I will not address the issue Sir take it up with my protector here"

[09:48]  Freeman (also a warrior ): Lady

[09:48]  Lady : Tal Freeman

[09:48]  Slave looks up but dares not speak after hearing the other master speak

[09:48]  Freeman (also a warrior ): greetings girl

[09:48]  Slave whispers, "Greetings Master"

[09:49]  My Warrior nods to Freeman but keeps the woman in view "Your protector ... Will he be the one whipping you senseless because you didn't give a man of this port and of his position the proper respect ... What are you woman ....disguised as some common slut .... Your conduct is beneath you ... "

[09:49]  Lady : this slaves master is a good friend of mine, she was asked to come here and check out our city, they are thinking of coming here

[09:49]  Freeman (also a warrior ) points a finger to the man

[09:49]  Lady : I was excited to see her

[09:50]  Freeman (also a warrior ): you don't talk to Lady  this way Sir

[09:50]  Freeman (also a warrior ): Lady  is not a slut

[09:50]  Slave two big tears roll down her cheeks thinking she has caused so much trouble and wonders how it happened as she was just trying to do as she was told

[09:51]  My Warrior frowns to freeman "You just saw me doing it ... and if you dare to question my judgement or my position you think again." he gave him a critical look "Her conduct was like one ... and if she isn't one .. perhaps you should take it up as your duty to teach the lady to behave and be more aware."

[09:51]  Freeman (also a warrior ): The highest a gorean man is, the highest must be his respectfull manners with Free ladies

[09:52]  My Warrior: When they are earned.

[09:52]  Lady : looks to freeman "I wil not speak another word to this man, if this is how he treats newcomers seeking a home here, well we will lose many"

[09:52]  My Warrior: Tell me Sir ... do you even know ... what happened.

The roleplay continued and eventhough there was some metagaming (first the woman comes to the aid of the slave out of nowhere also the man drops in this scene) next to it I was told in IM that the slave wouldn't join the sim because I was insulting and not giving proper Gorean roleplay, since I would respect the woman very highly and back down when her protector came. I was truly flabberghasted and asked some moderators to review my conduct since I was really starting to doubt if I had been to rigid or off base in my roleplay.

[Rayzor McAuley]

This is a great topic, Dove!  I tend to be intense at times, though not overly so as a general rule.  However, I have known quite a few people who have been told by moderators that they were being too intense....even when nobody complained   Yeah, I know, total BS.  A few have even been told to leave their home sim if they didn't dial it back to what the mods considered acceptable.  Disney I tell you!  Dove, one of these days, I hope I have the opportunity to witness you in action.

[Conall DeCuir]

It couldn't be posted on a better time ! Thank you for this rant Dove, since I was wondering if I might get in this mode of being some sort of stage that I am becoming to unconsiderate to others. Not because I don't care about their feelings, but the ooc drama I get by being - a Gorean man - that stands to his codes, his principles and beliefs. I am not an unreasonable player, but I have been in several scenes were I had to explain that a Gorean man won't take some kind of behavior and that my roleplay wasn't personal to the writer but to the scene. Just to give an example :

[09:42]  My Warrior (Captain) moves closer "I guess we will have to secure you girl ... and be sure that he wishes to have you or wishes you gone ... but I rather not give the pirates the chance." he frowns "And how would you do that since you own nothing girl ... pay the captain with a blowjob ... You think he won't fancy you that much to keep you to himself .. A slave is unprotected on the ship ... No ... you will heel me untill your owner comes to collect you." he takes out a piece of chain and looks if he can find a ring to attach it.

[09:43]  Lady : (name) slave greetings to you

[09:43]  Lady : smiles to her

[09:43]  Slave: Greetings Mistress

[09:43]  Lady : nods to the man

[09:43]  Lady : Tal Sir

[09:43]  Slave: yes Master, of course

[09:43]  My Warrior turns and glares at the woman "You greet a salve before me ?"

[09:44]  Lady : excuse me sir

[09:44]  Lady : i was excited to see her I have been waiting fo rher master to arrive

[09:44]  My Warrior arched a brow "Excuse you ... for what .. for not giving me the proper respect."

[09:44]  Lady : surely you know the ways of the heart now dont you

[09:45]  My Warrior narrows his eyes "What I know and don't seems not to be discussed ... The fact you do not give a man that is here ... working his ass off ... is greeted after a girl was ... What do you think I am ... some pussy whipped fellow that doesn't give a damn."

[09:47]  Freeman (also a warrior ): Tal Sir

[09:47]  Freeman (also a warrior ): Tal lovely Lady

[09:48]  Lady : tilts her head"I will not address the issue Sir take it up with my protector here"

[09:48]  Freeman (also a warrior ): Lady

[09:48]  Lady : Tal Freeman

[09:48]  Slave looks up but dares not speak after hearing the other master speak

[09:48]  Freeman (also a warrior ): greetings girl

[09:48]  Slave whispers, "Greetings Master"

[09:49]  My Warrior nods to Freeman but keeps the woman in view "Your protector ... Will he be the one whipping you senseless because you didn't give a man of this port and of his position the proper respect ... What are you woman ....disguised as some common slut .... Your conduct is beneath you ... "

[09:49]  Lady : this slaves master is a good friend of mine, she was asked to come here and check out our city, they are thinking of coming here

[09:49]  Freeman (also a warrior ) points a finger to the man

[09:49]  Lady : I was excited to see her

[09:50]  Freeman (also a warrior ): you don't talk to Lady  this way Sir

[09:50]  Freeman (also a warrior ): Lady  is not a slut

[09:50]  Slave two big tears roll down her cheeks thinking she has caused so much trouble and wonders how it happened as she was just trying to do as she was told

[09:51]  My Warrior frowns to freeman "You just saw me doing it ... and if you dare to question my judgement or my position you think again." he gave him a critical look "Her conduct was like one ... and if she isn't one .. perhaps you should take it up as your duty to teach the lady to behave and be more aware."

[09:51]  Freeman (also a warrior ): The highest a gorean man is, the highest must be his respectfull manners with Free ladies

[09:52]  My Warrior: When they are earned.

[09:52]  Lady : looks to freeman "I wil not speak another word to this man, if this is how he treats newcomers seeking a home here, well we will lose many"

[09:52]  My Warrior: Tell me Sir ... do you even know ... what happened.

The roleplay continued and eventhough there was some metagaming (first the woman comes to the aid of the slave out of nowhere also the man drops in this scene) next to it I was told in IM that the slave wouldn't join the sim because I was insulting and not giving proper Gorean roleplay, since I would respect the woman very highly and back down when her protector came. I was truly flabberghasted and asked some moderators to review my conduct since I was really starting to doubt if I had been to rigid or off base in my roleplay.

Oh i know that so well (((

[JF Kanto]

Excellent topic.  When the scene is intense and people *feel* the emotions, your characters words flow without thought from you the typist, THAT is roleplay at it's best.  Those are the scenes that brings us back again and again.

[Kaitlin Eiren]

Great topic Dove and I do separate those who cannot channel the emotions of the scene into the scene as being "less than" role-players.  At the first sign of something less than positive they go running to IM or they are waiting for you to open an IM and ask them if things are OK.  It is like pouring cold water over everyone.  I like being "in the moment" and I also hope other feel the same way but as soon as the other windows start lighting up it ruins it. 

[Tanti]

Great topic.

I don't know about others, but I LOVE role playing scenes where my character is miserable or in an awkward situation. The lovey dovey stuff is okay, too. But give me something that will wrench my character's heart and I'm totally sucked in, on the edge of my seat, can't stop typing, gripped.

Up with intensity! Down with using role play sims as tea rooms and chat rooms

[Shyla Timeless]

Good timing, Dove.  My short answer:  If it not intense and if it does not cause you some form of pause, why bother?

It is for this very reason that I am elevating Shyla's risk level on a daily basis.  I grew weary for 'feel good' scenes and figured I would have to DO IN CHARACTER what Shyla would do!  Isn't that -why- we role play?

[Gaia Later]

@Melchior - Wow!  I don't even know where to start with this one - other than to say I wish these type of SLoreans would find their way to a different type of role play sim.  Unfortunately, they are not the only ones that think and role play like this.  I suspect these folks have never read a book; or if they did - they just can't seem to step out of their modern mentality.  Erm . . why come to Gor?

Happily, this type of interaction is not usual for me where I normally role play.  I love it when somebody gets me going in role play; actually stirring up some real emotions.  Those are the role plays I live for - they are the ones that make me forget dinner or stay up well beyond my bedtime because I can't bear to stop it.  

At times I wish there was a basic entrance test folks would have to take before they entered a gorean sim.  

[Melchior Wardell]

@Melchior - Wow!  I don't even know where to start with this one - other than to say I wish these type of SLoreans would find their way to a different type of role play sim.  Unfortunately, they are not the only ones that think and role play like this.  I suspect these folks have never read a book; or if they did - they just can't seem to step out of their modern mentality.  Erm . . why come to Gor?

Happily, this type of interaction is not usual for me where I normally role play.  I love it when somebody gets me going in role play; actually stirring up some real emotions.  Those are the role plays I live for - they are the ones that make me forget dinner or stay up well beyond my bedtime because I can't bear to stop it.  

At times I wish there was a basic entrance test folks would have to take before they entered a gorean sim.  

The truth is ...I once started also ignorant ... I would hate to think that people were put off simply because they can't see that this is RP and that OOC I have nothing against them and would help them to understand what happened. However I fear that some of these people even go so far to IM'ing moderators to tell them how terrible I am in my RP and would even make a sim go down the drain because of it. It really made me wonder if it is just ingorance or perhaps the lack of willingness to learn or play edgy Gorean roleplay. It just makes me puzzled.

[Betony Baryl]

* Betony Baryl nods to Melchior.  I have a kind nature in RL and have no desire to make someone feel bad. (Just their IC character sometimes.  )   So when I have run-ins with people like this  . . it's just not fun.   Their ignorance pulls me out of my fun escapism to deal with their hurt feelings and drama.

I, too, think back how I was when I first started and all the misconceptions and onlinisms I was drowning in. I cut the noobs a lot of slack and where possible, try to mentor.  Usually the noobs are grateful for the guidance if it's done wisely.  I think back to all the gentle taps I had on my shoulder from other role players who had matured in their role play.  Of course, I spent time reading the books and asked a zillion questions too. (And I'm still asking questions!)   

But sadly, the noobs aren't the only offenders.  There's many role players (I use this word loosely) that still continue act like this after many months or even years of being in Gor.  The only remedy for these "tea and crumpet" role players are to give them a wide berth.  Chances are, you can tell what their "make-up" is like from observing some of their role play before you start with them.  And honestly, I may not be attacted to the same type of sims they like to play in too.

[Reven]

New people need to learn. But am I wrong to expect a person to beable to have read at least RP basics somwhere?

Or put at least some effort into researching their role before lecturing me ICly?

I was in RP recently where my character took offence to how a man called our healers Greens. And reven was really annoyed. Now this was done IC and the guy IMs one of the guys in the group and calls me a rude bitch and I had no right acting like that?

Before in Minus i upset a slave girl to the point I made her cry oocly. for picking her up IC. she sent me NCs of letters. Now I wasnt being rude. I made sure to let the person know that this was IC reaction not OOC. But no matter what I tried I was ended up to be made look like the bad person. Cause I what? let the slave screw up so badly and serve me what I didnt ask for?

I love RP that is filled with detail emotion, intent for me to get lost completely to the point that the IM comes to say hey are you comfortable with this? My reaction will always always be. keep going.

I remember when my character was collared.  Oh god RL i was so scared for her. She had no clue nor  want or desire to do it. and omg. It showed in her RP. It wasnt planned. She was never one to be a velcro collar and thank god he let her free btw.!! is all i can say. But some amazing Rp happened with her. but it was to the point that I just went wow. Thats the kind of RP i love and relish.

But sometimes. You put so much effort into things. To get it tossed back at you OOCly. or OOCly bitched at cause your trying to RP how you should RP. Because people get offended at the words spoken by characters. *shrugs*

But like Gaia I am also in a position now where thankfully I have, well hope I have. some awesome Rpers. who bat off each other and do great scenes weather its the scary death scene. or the hilarious drunk scene. They know what they are doing and take it all Ic where IC should be. Not once do we go HEY Im not happy with that In IMs or that

[Melchior Wardell]

But like Gaia I am also in a position now where thankfully I have, well hope I have. some awesome Rpers. who bat off each other and do great scenes weather its the scary death scene. or the hilarious drunk scene. They know what they are doing and take it all Ic where IC should be. Not once do we go HEY Im not happy with that In IMs or that

Yes thankfully those scenes are there too and those make it worth the effort. They make me perhaps to greedy for more of those instead of those that force me to go to IM to correct others, since who am I to tell them what is Gorean or not. Even in these forums we aren't always clear on things, but I do feel it is important to understand that there is a very destinct difference between me IC or OOC.